Tag Archives: authenticity

Can Self-Promotion Be Authentic?

This blog was originally published March 20, 2012, on the New Existentialist Blog. It was republished here after the New Existentialist Blog was discontinued.

Self-promotion often gets a bad rap, and for good reason. Most people have experienced individuals who frequently self-aggrandize and promote themselves. These individuals often are dismissed as narcissistic and self-centered. When analyzing these self-promoters, even the arm-chair analyst knows that it is common for this to be an attempt to cover insecurities and low self-esteem. Other times it is deemed as the result of the lack of social skills and self-awareness. With such negativity associated with self-promotion, most people avoid this behavior at all costs, even to the degree of false humility.

Yet, in their book The Truth About Sucking Up: How Authentic Self-Promotion Benefits You and Your Organization, Hernez-Broome, McLaughlin, and Trovas argue that many people need to spend more time self-promoting. They suggest that self-promotion can be authentic and even generative. Although Hernez-Broome and colleagues were writing to a business audience, the applications of this book extend well beyond the business world.

HernezBroome and her coauthors argue, and provide evidence from their research, that most people do not like engaging in self-promotion. They would prefer that others recognize their talent, ideas, and product simply on the basis of their merit. Unfortunately, this rarely occurs.

Photo by Louis Hoffman, PhD

The Value of Self-Promotion

Hernez-Broome and colleagues provide a few compelling reasons why self-promotion is beneficial for individuals and their organization. First, it helps the right people to be selected for promotion and responsibility, which benefits the individual and the organization. Often, very talented people do not get recognized and promoted because they do not make themselves visible. Second, it creates opportunities to utilize one’s skills, advance in one’s career, and have increased job security.

As noted, The Truth About Sucking Up was written primarily to a business audience, so I would like to suggest additional benefits for those in academic and clinical work. First, academics spend a good deal of time contributing to the body of knowledge in their field. After spending many months, or sometimes years, working on an article or book, it is natural to be proud of the finished product and desire for it to be read. Many academics hope that once it is in print, people will magically discover it, read it, and love it. More often than not, most papers and many books seem to fall into a black hole of academic work with the author never knowing if more than a handful of people read the final product. Self-promotion can help for our work to have a positive impact on the scholarly community and practitioners who may benefit from our work, as well as turning the time invested into something more than a simple intellectual
exercise and line on one’s vita.

In academia, students, professors, and universities benefit from authentic self-promotion. I have worked at a number of academic institutions with extremely talented professionals that were unknown and unrecognized because of their humility and lack of self-promotion; they did not promote themselves and the university did not promote the faculty. At other places, with much less accomplished and talented faculty, the university and the faculty helped create an appearance of accomplishment that is distorted and aggrandizing. Highlighting the work and accomplishment of faculty increases the visibility of the university, helps attract students that are excited to work with the faculty at the university, and increases the faculty’s satisfaction because they are working with students who share similar interests.

Many clinicians struggle with self-promotion, too. They want clients to come clamoring to their office because they recognize the value of therapy, the value of the therapist’s approach, and the therapist’s skill. Yet, this is not reality. Existential and humanistic therapists hope clients will just know the value of this approach to therapy and come rushing to work with them. It is becoming increasing evident that the fit between therapist and client, including the therapist approach to therapy, is just as important as the skill of the therapist. For therapists to attract clients, and clients that are the right fit for their approach, self-promotion is necessary.

The Risks of Self-Promotion

One factor leading me to write about “authentic self-promotion” is my distaste for much of the self-promotion I witness. I grow weary of the many Emails I receive of individuals promoting themselves or their product and people connecting with me on Facebook or Linkedin just to inundate me with self-promote. I appreciate the value of Facebook, Linkedin, and Academia.edu for authentic self-promotion and believe these can be used well, but more often see it used for more self-serving purposes. The difference is the motivation for the self-promotion. Authentic self-promotion emerges from a passion for the topic, content, service, or product, whereas inauthentic self-promotion is about promoting oneself or about the benefits one gets from the self-promotion, such as greater prestige or financial compensation.

In an interview on NPR, Meshell Ndegeocello gets to the heart of the distinction between authentic and inauthentic self-promotion. Although she discusses this in the context of the musical industry, it is easily adaptable to many other settings:

Either you do it for the music or you want to be a star, and those are two different things. And I just like to play music. Surround yourself with honest people, is one thing I’d say. The worst lie you can do is lie to yourself-just be clear (full interview available at http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=114237531).

Inauthentic self-promotion is often rather evident and counterproductive. The irony of authentic self-promotion is that it really is not about the self at all; it is about what one has to offer (i.e., generativity).

The Paradox of Self-Promotion and Authenticity

In part due to the dualistic tendencies in Western thought, our society has a tendency to view things in a categorical manner. Existential thought, however, advocates a paradoxical view of the world that suggests categories are often insufficient. In the case of self-promotion, the paradox is that authentic self-promotion is rarely, if ever, purely authentic.

This is part of the struggle for many, like myself, who struggle with self-promotion. It has been
a difficult for me to write this essay. I am quite poor at self-promotion, though hopefully improving. Often I have sat in settings where it would be natural and fitting to promote, or even just mention, my work, yet I remain quite. In wanting any promotion of myself or my work to be authentic, I often remain quiet if I am aware of any selfish motivation. Two things have helped me improve my comfort level with self-promotion. First, the acknowledgement that motivations are never pure, and that even self-promotion rooted in authenticity has some impure motives, helped me accept my discomfort without being stifled by it.

Second, in conversations with Gina Hernez-Broome (the lead author of the book), and discussing her work on this topic, I began to recognize the value of self-promotion. I still often stumble in my attempts at self-promotion; it is not natural for me. Many conversations with colleagues have assured me that I am not alone. Yet, I now recognize the value of it and often have served as an ambassador, of sorts, for authentic self-promotion.

Conclusion

Authentic self-promotion is often accompanied by a degree of discomfort. Those who are committed to keeping their self-promotion authentic and generative often are uncomfortable engaging it. Hopefully, thinking through the advantages can help individuals and organizations recognize the value of self-promotion rooted in authenticity.

~ Louis Hoffman

Note: Although this site is owned by Louis Hoffman, it supports the Rocky Mountain Humanistic Counseling and Psychological Association (RMHCPA), which is a 501(c)3 nonprofit organization. As an Amazon Associate, RMHCPA earns from qualifying purchases made through the links on this page.

Work-Life Balance, Authenticity, and Existential Values

This was originally published on the New Existentialist Blog on March 4, 2014. It was republished here after the New Existentialist Blog was discontinued.

I deeply believe that one of our greatest crises in the United States, as well as much of the world, is our inability to achieve work-life balance. Although “crisis” may sound dramatic, I believe there is a case for it. The psychological and physical health costs are quite significant, despite the difficulty in calculating them. These costs are hidden under personal and family stress, fast food and other poor eating habits, and habitual stress.

I come from a family of workaholics. Early in my career, 80 hour workweeks were not unusual for me and 60 hour plus work weeks were the norm. I would often hear, “I don’t know how you do it all,” and would appreciate this as a compliment. It was not until later that I began realizing this was an indictment of a problem. My personal change came through love, relationships, and reflection upon existential values.

While I spent many of my days talking about the importance of love, compassion, and relationships, I had trouble authentically living these because by all accounts, what was driving my life, or my ultimate concern, had become work and the development of existential psychology. Yet, the existential psychology I adhere to drives us to something beyond existential psychology; its ultimate concern is love and relationship. Yet, paradoxically, my commitment to existential psychology and work was interfering with my ability to authentically live it. This parallels what I’ve routinely witnessed in advocates of self-care: frequently, the individuals who teach and advocate for self-care are those who are the poorest at it and need it the most.

As I recognized my inauthentic lifestyle, I reflected upon what were the deepest values I wanted to live in my life. The top priority was easy: my sons, my wife, and my family. Next in line were my friendships. The third value in my big three was living a life of passionate compassion, which included direct expressions of compassion and concern along with advocacy and activism. I recognized that until I began living these values, I had no right to teach and train people in existential psychology as I could not do it authentically.

The shift is not easy. One of my first commitments in this change was that I began rarely working in the evenings or weekends, including appointments, phone calls, or emails. When I began implementing this, I would often have frustrated and angry emails on Monday because I had not responded to emails from Friday or the weekend. Over time, as I made my commitments to balance clear to colleagues and students, this boundary began to be respected. Yet, the volume of emails I have on Monday often still feels overwhelming. Frequently, all day Monday is nothing but catching up on email. I am also less efficient and responding to emails and everyone’s demands of me, including semi-frequently
missing an email. While I feel bad for aspects of this trend, knowing that it comes out of a commitment to balance helps me accept this personal limitation. In a world where receiving 50 or more emails a day is common, a commitment to balance sometimes means that things will fall through the cracks.

Challenges

Trying to live a balanced life in an unbalanced world is not easy. I recognize that my ability to achieve some semblance of it is connected to my privilege. It is less easy for many, including my students who have to work, often full-time, to be able to go to school, and my colleagues who have to work two or more jobs to make ends meet. This is a sign of a broken system. We need a cultural change.

The economy in the United States is one of the biggest challenges. Many individuals have to work multiple part-time jobs, or add part-time employment onto their full-time job, to make ends meet. Many employers are asking their employees to work more hours, take on more tasks, and be more efficient for the good of the company or to protect their jobs. Some fear that they will not have a job without working excessive hours. Furthermore, the willingness to put in many hours often seems more prized by employers than the ability to do good work. Yet, if the only way a company can survive is by exploiting its employees and putting their psychological and physical health at risk, then it should be asked whether it should survive. This is particularly true in mental health agencies where often therapists and other providers are worked to the point of severe costs to their own psychological and even physical health.

For many, like myself, the love of what one does is a challenge. I love teaching, writing, and providing psychotherapy and supervision. They are not just things that I do for a paycheck— they are things I do out of love for these tasks and recognition of their meaning. If I were independently wealthy so that I never needed to work again and was not allowed to take a paycheck, I would still want to do this work for free. But I must recognize that I am better at this work when I live a balanced life. It negatively impacts myself, my students, my clients, and even my employer when I do too much.

Conclusion

I am often not as efficient as I used to be and not as productive. For those used to my prior levels of productivity, they are sometimes frustrated with me for not doing as much or responding as quickly as they are used to. While I wish this wasn’t true, I am glad the reason for these limitations is that love of family and friends, concern for myself, and an authentic commitment to my existential values have taken over as my lived ultimate concerns.

~ Louis Hoffman, PhD